Faulting Footie on Faith

The Devils' Crest

I never thought they would ever touch football. After all it is the unacknowledged religion of so many. And despite all sorts of mutterings from our mullahs about people mixing together in large gatherings because they could lead to, ohmigod, sex, not a word was ever breathed about the large gatherings of humanity known as the football crowd. Perhaps they thought girls don't watch football or that Malaysian football is so poor these days, it's not worth talking about.

But no, I was wrong! Ever the spoilsports (as opposed to the sporting) they actually tried it. Right after the one month of footie ecstacy known as the World Cup, our mullahs come out and said that nobody should wear Brazil, Portugal, Serbia, Barcelona and Norway t-shirts because of the crosses on them. Funny, no mention of England. Some fans there maybe? (Personally I wouldn't wear England t-shirts after their performance in South Africa..)

Luckily they didn't mention Spain...maybe because Spain has a Muslim past. And France, which is banning the burqa in public places, had of course Zinedine Zidane. And Germany has that Turkish fellow. Wouldn't be good to ban teams that have Muslims in them, would it?

Maybe like me, they don't think about football except once every four years. And then suddenly noticed these jerseys. Obviously they don't watch much EPL football either, having never noticed before that the Man U team is nicknamed The Red Devils. (And the way that red-haired Rooney played at the World Cup, would you call him a devil or a lamb, eh?)

But honestly, are we such a weak people that the wearing of a t-shirt would shake our faith? God must be laughing. Has Saudi Arabia, for many the 'beacon' of Islam, banned any of these t-shirts? Aren't the Arabs trying to buy a football team or two?

Of course, now they've backtracked, sort of. Someone must ha! ve point ed out the large numbers of footie fans among the, um, faithful. And no doubt the many UMNO members among them too. (Although funny that their logic is that since Muslims should know what to wear or not to, there is no need for a fatwa. On other subjects, they don't seem to trust us to decide on our own as much.) Maybe the fact that it's yet again brought us 'fame' in the international arena had a bearing.

Now if they'd said that it's a sin to just sit on your bums watching football on TV all the time and that it's much better to actually go out and play it. Or that it's a sin that there aren't enough playing fields out there for kids to play on, that might be something.

Luckily our mullahs haven't yet gone the way of the Somalis who think that there's nothing more sinful than watching the World Cup. But the way things are going in our beloved country, one day we may just get all-Somalian.

Meanwhile, can we please keep sport a religion-free arena? We need to breathe somewhere.
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